I Know One Thing; That I Know Nothing

Written by Chevy Chinburn

Could you imagine knowing for certain you have all the answers? Waking everyday in total assurance that your beliefs are the perfect recipe for utopia. Attacking anyone who opposes isn’t merely natural but vital.

The world is a complicated place. Being an expert in anything other than masturbating in your parents basement takes years of education and dedication. Let me bring your attention to a Swedish man that travels the world playing with an illuminated ball.

A simple act, though not an easy one. This man has spent countless hours mastering his craft. Harnessing the movement and precision required to perform such aesthetic yet trivial performances.

What’s the point of bringing attention to this skill? The point is despite appearing easier, figuring the process out is arduous. And callously calling yourself an expert needs repercussions. Today people seem to be so emotionally charged. For example, when Trump was elected we either heard apocalyptic forecasts detailing the rebirth of racism, or triumph battle cries against the global leftist alliance. Which one was correct? Neither, who the fuck knows.

Ill tell you who knows, some lippy nineteen year old university student who’s read three books in the last year. The frightening aspect about mass protest movements, is just how little information they assemble on. Last year about 50 vegans protested outside a slaughterhouse, harassing foreign workers and throwing blood on departing butchers. Questioning the protesters, they bluntly referred all inquirers over to a documentary film called “cowspiracy”. A netflix sponsored doco about the hazardous meat industry that’s responsible for a plethora issues, everything from salmonella to global warming.

Is this true? Again who the fuck really knows, some do, I don’t. I never studied nutrition or spent years studying empirical global weather patterns, assiduously comparing them to current weather temperatures to pre industrial meat cycles. One netflix documentary, that’s all it took. Of course these imbeciles didn’t possess the necessary knowledge to corroborate or even challenge what they were hearing. None of that was needed, the sensationalized and carefully planted videos of animal cruelty were enough, they were convinced. Being vegan was heroic, they were taking the first steps to saving the world.

We all know someone who watched zeitgeist once and definitively claimed 9/11 was inside job(I’m probably guilty),or an unproductive Antifa goon who’s read three pages of Marx’s Communist Manifesto and suddenly finds purpose in life. We’ve all seen youtube videos of citizen reporters interviewing attendees at Trump Rallies, Antifa Protests, Alt-Right demonstrations etc; at worse they know nothing, at best they have a few pre-programmed vague talking points to prop their objective up.
I guess being apart of something is alluring, joining a group with shared values and altruistic goals constructs meaning within one’s life. As can be seen by this whole punch Nazis phenomenon. Rarely do organised protest groups achieve their aspirations, it’s not beneficial for their personal life to do so. Protesting is becoming more and more like having a hobby, an outlet for bonding if you don’t like playing basketball. And it’s anything but effective, more often than not based on vague truths or downright lies.

Black Lives Matter continues to galvanize around a false narrative, Animal rights activists direct their venom at people just trying to feed their families or buy a packet of smokes, KKK members idolise Hitler, despite him being a sworn enemy of America and Antifa are dense enough to behave like the fascists they so fervently denounce. You can’t make this stuff, lies run the world.

Taking this a step further: How many wars have been fought on lies? The Gulf of Tonkin? False WMDS? Mysteriously disappearing Pearl Harbour? Okay maybe that was real, or maybe Roosevelt baited the Japanese into attacking Pearl Harbour,  strategically placing America’s most valued Warships out on a naval exercise at the time.  Again, truth is stranger than fiction, but fiction seems to dictate to reality. Once a mob, army unit or country is committed to a cause, accuracy of information takes a backseat to the euphoric zeal of a mobilised collective, hell bent on being the victors, on being the good guys.

We can evolve all we want, nothing beats the primal gratification of conquering the bad guys, defeating the enemy, the enemy that thought it was better than you, more right, when they couldn’t be more wrong. Because you have the answers, the way you’re living is perfect, you’ve got it all figured and the if everyone in the world was more like you, then there would be no muslims.

Peace out.

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