“You’re special. You’re amazing. You can do anything.” The mantra of millennials. Accurate for a small minority but an outright lie for most. Modern parents are encouraged to be sycophantic when it comes to their children. This is well intentioned and easy, considering the intense biological protectiveness and love that parents and mothers in particular exhibit.
Previous generations weren’t told they were special, shielded from truths, given counseling or safe spaces. During the great depression people were fighting for survival, not claiming to be above the nine to five life. Our ancestors recognised their reality as it was and valued survival over happiness. That humans deserve happiness is a modern construct.
The idea that everyone is worthy of praise contradicts reality. The world has evolved but human nature hasn’t. No one really cares about you and no one ever will unless you do something that brings values to others. Your mum will probably love and praise you unconditionally, but thats as pathetic as it is unsatisfying. Despite what you’re told or think, chances are that you’re a boring replaceable person with no fruitful talent.
Teachers exemplify this. They regurgitate the lie that everyone is equal and overstate the importance of an individual’s feelings. Nowadays, student’s emotions trump academic performance, grades are subjective and marks are given on the bases of the average score instead of a comparison. The mean score has dropped which results in higher scores but lower standards. Under-performing kids are typically re-branded as visual, or hands on learners. Any excuse that avoids the reality. And if it’s not the student’s fault, then it has to be the method. This appeasing feelings-come-first formula permeates youth sporting culture. Primary schools no longer keep scores during footy games, on-field language is policed and participation awards have become the expected.
Society has substituted greatness for inclusion. Soothing the average isolates the skilled. The high achievers consequently are robbed of a target to strive for, effectively promoting apathy within the productive, motivated and gifted students. Talent gets shunned instead of nurtured. Setting a dangerous precedent, it’s also leading people into misery. You have to cruel to be kind, short term kindness is only setting the mediocre up to expect more than they’re capable of. Coddling children makes it harder for them to find their true uniqueness, most people if they’re lucky are only good at one thing, and horribly incompetent at almost everything else. Without learning where you’re disadvantaged, you won’t find what you’re proficient at.
The peril of equality of outcome cheats people of introspection. Taking away responsibility leaves the people victimised, feeling helpless instead of motivated to improve. This spoiled up bring doesn’t disappear in higher education. Manifesting absolute lunacy at universities and colleges. Safe spaces, trigger warnings, false relevance and cultish like behaviour appearing absurd to outside observers. Uppity Uni students ooze pretension, believing their opinions to be important, considering themselves intelligent despite never having existed outside the echo chamber of academia. They violently protest, patronise people that disagree with them and get upset when their viewpoints are challenged. Acting like petulant toddlers when things don’t match their social justice facebook groups outlook of the world. It’s alarming that majority of college students can’t even consider an opposing point of view without screaming or disparaging individuals who don’t conform. This haughtiness has been cultivated since birth.
This entitled mindset is paradoxical to what the job market asks or any wealthy entrepreneur exhibits, completely antithetical to what a successful attitude requires. How many times have we heard “I can’t get a job”, following up that statement with the question of “what do you do?” Normally results in pensive silence. TAX THE ONE PERCENT! How about you work hard and becoming part of the “one percent?” Last year baristas were complaining about customers talking on their mobile phone while ordering, just shut up and make my coffee. No one cares that you feel demeaned, acquire more skills and grow into someone less replaceable, you don’t matter that much.’ Life throws challenge at everyone, except people can’t handle adversity when they spend biggest part of their development sheltered from it. Preferring to complain on social media then overcome obstacles.
Social media plays a large part in the epidemic of unregulated self-importance. Giving people that don’t necessarily deserve a platform, a place to vent their empty-headed opinions. It’s not unusual for teenagers, or young adults to garner an astronomical amount of likes for mundane pictures and status, especially girls. Now the entire surrounding area is stalking each other on Facebook. Creating the illusion that people care what you’re doing. Likes are given in hopes it’s reciprocated, people engage in certain activities hoping to get the magic photo for instagram. Spawning a false sense of validation that is superficial to the core. When you act in a way to impress others who only guide their behaviours based on trying to impress others, it’s basically a vanity circle jerk. Majority of those likes are fraudulent, coming from narcissism not sincerity. Truth is your facebook friends don’t care about you anymore than your immediate friends.
Real friends exist, they’re just scarce. The bulk of people privately don’t even like their friends, projecting their own insecurities onto them. A lot friendship is mutual neediness, a way two people comfort their position in life. If you think your friends care about you, try stepping out of your comfort zone, or pursuing a goal. Chances are you’ll be ridiculed or laughed at, any personal transformation can be threatening to their self-image. Most people’s fear when trying something new is “what will my friends say?”. We’ve been around gossip before, most involving people they claim to like, the bulk of negative talk about you traditionally comes from those closest, friendship circles can be nothing more than a subtle competition for social superiority. In fact when someone breaks up with their partner, it’s all too common the end up sleeping with the guy you play basketball with on a wednesday night. If you consider yourself beloved by your peers, chances are they just don’t have any better options, people will always prioritise themselves, and are quick to jump ship if the people seem cooler and the music is louder. Willingly prioritising their happiness over your feelings.
Understanding your insignificance is oddly liberating, through impressionism comes empowerment. The beautiful thing about being alone is knowing you’re completely free to determine the path of your own life. Stop crying about what you deserve or how things should be, decide your own fate. Thinking you can be happy all the time is unachievable, talked about only in special schools, commonly known as universities. Assuming you’re never going to get insulted, bullied or rejected is the perfect recipe for depression. Real life requires patience, fulfilling work, authentic friends, discovery worldly and self truths demand commitment and sacrifice. A whiff a happiness is all the lucky get.